Thankful for Every day!

I am going to try and get back into posting and sharing pictures....I know I have been slacking. I have been struggling lately with life in general and trying to keep up and keep sane, LOL.

We had a big scare with Austin on Saturday and it reminds me of how precious life is. I was actually just trying to try and "live in today" before this happened and I almost wanted to throw that out the window and keep on worrying over what could happen, always thinking the worst case scenerio when it comes to my kids, but I turned it around and am trying my hardest to just live and let my kids live and enjoy every minute of the time I have with them. Doing this I have found that I am calmer and actually do enjoy the little things more. Taking my kids to the store, joking around, just being with them and spending time, hugging, kissing, interacting, etc.

Austin had an episode where I thought he may be in serious jeopardy of actually dying. I hate to sound so dramatic, but that is what it was. We still are not sure of what happened, but are thinking it may have been a seizure. He was white as a ghost, turning blue and on and off unresponsive for around 15 minutes. We had no idea if he hit his head, ingested something or what was going on so it was a complete mystery on why this was happening. By the time the ambulance arrived, he was awake but dazed looking and by the time we got to the ER he was alert and talking again. Bloodwork was normal, x-ray normal, etc. We will be going to his regular doctor today to try and brainstorm and possibly schedule some more testing to see if we can get to the bottom of it. I was frantic, begging him to stay with me and at the same time wondering what the hell I would do if this was the end.

Anyway, always remember to enjoy life, live every day, tell those around you that you love them, hug them and try not to worry about tomorrow or the next day or next month. Live IN today.

I am so grateful that I have this time with my children and my family. I am grateful that I had so much time with my Grandma Ione who passed away on September 25th. I am grateful that I was able to make it to her funeral, and spend that last little time seeing her off on her journey. I am grateful that I got the opportunity to talk to her on the phone just hours before she passed on. I am grateful that she was ready, calm and had lots of family surrounding her. I am grateful.

Gratitude List

Life can get pissy. Let's face it, it isn't always sunshine and roses. We have crappy people in our life, crappy circumstances and overall crap to deal with at times. BUT, we don't always have to focus on that crap. We can choose to focus on the great things in our lives that we love and cherish. Why spend time dwelling on icky stuff when there are so many other things to do and more positive ways to spend our lives? So....I will start with my list:

Joanna's Gratitude list

1. Dave - I am so thankful for my husband coming into my life. He is really my 2nd half and makes me laugh and smile and feel good about myself. He is also strong and supportive.

2. My kids - All 5 of them!! They have all taught me so many things. It is because of them that I want to be a better person both inside and out.

3. My mom - Best mom ever. Supportive, best friend!!

4. My brothers and their families - They are the best I could have. I think about them and almost instantly laugh cause they are both so comical. I am proud to have them both as brothers. Of course their spouses ain't too bad either....Both of my brothers got lucky! I have very awesome sister-in-laws.

5. In-laws - no awful jokes about in-laws from me. I got very lucky. I have a great mother-in-law and supportive father-in-law that are always willing to help out with whatever. We get together often for dinner or cards or just hanging out. I couldn't have asked for a better set of in-laws. My sister-in-law, Ruthann is one of a kind. She has suffered great loss, but still keeps an upbeat attitude and smile. I have great respect for her and Darin. They are great parents and great people all around.

6. Family & Friends - there are way too many people to list off individually. I have a huge family that I love endlessly. My grandma, my aunts and uncles, my cousins, friends (online friends too!) that I think of as family, etc. I think of these people often and am thankful they are in my life.

7. Health - I am fairly healthy and working on improving that and my kids are all healthy too. That is a lot to be grateful for. There is so much suffering in the world. We are lucky and blessed!

8. Work - more than enough to keep us busy and useful. Plus the work that gives us the means to support our family.

9. Challenges - yes, challenges are what make us stronger people. Life is not a cake-walk for anyone I would guess. Everyone has their hardships and dark days. Its how we meet those challenges and overcome them that defines us. And remember, the person next to you scowling could be having one of those days. Instead of judging, show a bit of sympathy and compassion.

That is what I have time for at this moment. Work is calling (lunch for the kids) and not calling all that quietly, I might add. Feel free to do your own list for yourself or others to see.