Thankful for Every day!

I am going to try and get back into posting and sharing pictures....I know I have been slacking. I have been struggling lately with life in general and trying to keep up and keep sane, LOL.

We had a big scare with Austin on Saturday and it reminds me of how precious life is. I was actually just trying to try and "live in today" before this happened and I almost wanted to throw that out the window and keep on worrying over what could happen, always thinking the worst case scenerio when it comes to my kids, but I turned it around and am trying my hardest to just live and let my kids live and enjoy every minute of the time I have with them. Doing this I have found that I am calmer and actually do enjoy the little things more. Taking my kids to the store, joking around, just being with them and spending time, hugging, kissing, interacting, etc.

Austin had an episode where I thought he may be in serious jeopardy of actually dying. I hate to sound so dramatic, but that is what it was. We still are not sure of what happened, but are thinking it may have been a seizure. He was white as a ghost, turning blue and on and off unresponsive for around 15 minutes. We had no idea if he hit his head, ingested something or what was going on so it was a complete mystery on why this was happening. By the time the ambulance arrived, he was awake but dazed looking and by the time we got to the ER he was alert and talking again. Bloodwork was normal, x-ray normal, etc. We will be going to his regular doctor today to try and brainstorm and possibly schedule some more testing to see if we can get to the bottom of it. I was frantic, begging him to stay with me and at the same time wondering what the hell I would do if this was the end.

Anyway, always remember to enjoy life, live every day, tell those around you that you love them, hug them and try not to worry about tomorrow or the next day or next month. Live IN today.

I am so grateful that I have this time with my children and my family. I am grateful that I had so much time with my Grandma Ione who passed away on September 25th. I am grateful that I was able to make it to her funeral, and spend that last little time seeing her off on her journey. I am grateful that I got the opportunity to talk to her on the phone just hours before she passed on. I am grateful that she was ready, calm and had lots of family surrounding her. I am grateful.